Today, as I was going about my normal Monday chores, I was hit hard by guilt and shame surrounding the sin in my life. Not only present, but also past. Why is forgiveness easy for me to extend to others yet almost impossible to extend to myself? Where does this come from? Who do I think I am that I will ask God for forgiveness and expect Him to extend it, and yet I think I am higher than Him to not extend it to myself?
We are called to forgive others their transgressions against us, but I think we are also called to forgive ourselves for what we have done. It amazes me how often I find myself feeling guilty for sins I have already been forgiven for. I agree that to feel remorse means to continually repent and not fall back into that sin, but there comes a point when I need to realize that all sin is sin, no matter the size. Humanity creates the distinction between sin, NOT God. He is the one who sees us for who we are and if we repent and ask for forgiveness, there is no stopping the love and grace we are extended by our loving Savior.
Shame and guilt are the tools of Satan and we must stand firm against them. Forgiveness is the key to this and I have to keep telling myself that the Lord sees me as a clean, pure daughter of Christ and I am completely and utterly free from my sin. I am a broken woman who is so loved by the Lord that it is beyond evident that the shame and guilt I feel are only there to keep my from my loving God. God loves me too much to let me feel those things. He died on the cross for a reason: to save the world from our sin. Now all I have to do is let myself be loved enough, to forgive myself, and to love myself for who I am.
"For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son. That whoever believes in Him will not perish, but have everlasting life." John 3:16
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